I'm getting flaked on tonight. I'm not surprised.
The warning signs were there. I saw them. I had a conversation with people that I trust about the warning signs.
I really worry about planning with somebody who I have heard flaked on other people.
I don't like to play with boys who have been blocked by people that I know.
The bdsm world uses references to recognize safe and sane tops and bottoms.
I get worried by people who want a lot of detail about what's going to happen. The people who really enjoy the bdsm seem to want to be surprised. This seems to be one of a couple things.
I think that some boys have limits that they aren't comfortable talking about, and are looking for answers without wanting to be honest about the questions.
I think some of the boys get off by imagining the act more than performing the act.
I get uncomfortable with people who want a good bit of phone or online chat before meeting.
I don't have much empathy. I try to compensate with sympathy.
Over the phone and online chat, I have trouble since I can't see the body language.
I tend to answer the questions that are asked verbally, rather than the answering the questions that the boy wants to ask.
I look at the people that boys have listed as their friends on recon. I recognize a number of people who treat recon like facebook, and will friend anybody and everybody. These being the only friends on the profile is a big warning sign.
I understand that boys that check out references before play are more reliable. I am a bit more comfortable knowing that some boys have checked out mine.
Each of these is a warning sign. But none of them is absolute.
New boys in particular will have many of these warning signs, without necessarily being a flake.
And I do enjoy playing with new guys.
This is not the first time I have been flaked on. It will not be the last. It's frustrating, but it won't stop me from playing.
