Over the years I have made minor adjustments to the number. But having this number answers questions. Like how much more a non-stop flight is worth extra money. How valuable a red-eye flight is. Which video store to go to. Whether to buy from amazon, or a local store.
After I began to understand how powerful this one number was in my life I started to look for similar numbers that govern our lives.
There are cliches about not being able to put a price on human life. The life insurance and medical insurance industries however rely on the ability to make a first order approximation of this.
Constrained resource allocation problems tend to make clear the least objectionable alternative clear. Resource constraints force us to make trade-offs. When trade-offs are gut-wrenching it means that the things being compared are roughly equivalent value (for some odd definition of the word value). The insurance industry needs to create a mapping between this value and money.
The standard way that this is done is by cost per quality adjusted life year. The British standard is about $46,000 per quality adjusted life year. The American private insurance standard is a little bit higher. The insurance industry has placed a price on human life.
These same techniques allow us to start to estimate the price of sex. We all pay for sex. Just not necessarily by a stack of bills on the nightstand.
There are costs associated with sex. There are hours spent in the gym. Hours spent practicing rope knots and rigging.
There is equipment. I account for these in a couple different ways. There are the consumables, like condoms, lube, and duct tape. These are direct costs.
Then there are capital expenditures. This includes restraints, gags, and ropes. Generally I assume a three year depreciation.
Then there are the big purchases. This includes the sleep sack, the hoods, and the dungeon itself. I have been operating on an assumption of a seven year depreciation for the big purchases.
I count in other costs that are a little more ambiguous. I count in much of the cost of my personal trainer. I count in a chunk of the cost of my vacations.
It turns out that sex is really really expensive.
But sexual experiences are not all the same. Things we do affects both quality and quantity of sex. Sex with people we find interesting and attractive is more desirable. Sex involving activities we find interesting is more desirable. I find myself moving towards a model similar to the quality adjusted life year, which I will call quality adjusted sexual experience.
Moving to a model of quality adjusted sexual experience doesn't answer my questions. (I don't know quite how much extra value I put on sex with a boy I have tied in intricate bondage.) But it does frame the questions in ways that make me feel like there exist answers.
