I have excerpted the emails below. I have updated the links, and removed identifying information:
To happyfrosh
Hey there.
Thinking back over playing with you the other day, I wanted to send you the feedback I promised.
Arriving:
Seeing you open your door decked out in full gear gives me a boner thinking about it even as I type this. You go all out, and the sight of pecs and muscles straining through all that leather and harness...it sets the stage very nicely. You also are great about building trust and comfort by offering a drink and chilling out for a bit in the kitchen to make a guy feel at ease. You did that on both of my visits and it's a classy touch.
Walking Upstairs:
A guy I played with several years ago had a thing where after arrival and a brief chat, he'd say, "okay, so are you ready for this?", and then upon the affirmative, he'd lock on a chain collar with a solid padlock, and say, "okay, this stays on for the duration; I want you to remember that you're stuck until I let you go, and this collar I just put you in will make sure you remember," and he'd lead me to the playroom like a dog on a leash; usually in cuffs and gagged; once blindfolded. I can imagine you doing something like that to demonstrate you're in charge from that minute onwards. I also liked the way you said, "okay, strip." Simple, commanding, no-nonsense.
Workout Bondage Bench:
That piece of gear is just fantastic, and you have really thought out how to use it to it's full potential. I love when you put me on that, and meticulously adjust each restraint and chain and spreader bar until there is almost zero movement possible. I also like the intense look in your eyes as you engineer the locking, and I get off big time watching your muscles as you chain me up. Consider getting a set of these Humane Restraints with adjustable locking slots. Your black leather restraints clearly do the job, but they are light and if the world were really ending I think I could break them if I had to to get away. The Humane Restraints (the ones pictured are the best of the series because they are adjustable with the slots and good for connecting to things) would take the experience to the next level in terms of helplessness and also would make chaining a guy up even easier for you, as you connect the chain/lock to the restraint, and doing so completes the locking mechanism. Here's a link, and you can buy these many places, including eBay:
Humane Restraint Leather 501 Restraint, Wrist, Standard, 15", Pair
Electro: (wand/chain):
I didn't know I was into this gear, but obviously I am, even thought I don't really like the electro zap (but anything mixed with good bondage works for me I'd say). It has an 18th century feel to it, so it's intriguing. It makes me a little nervous because it seems more like raw electricity straight out of the wall, but you have a command of it and are very careful. I worried a bit when I thought about the electro unit and the metal of the bondage bench and chains...wondered if somehow the electro could arc and come from the unit to the wall in a big burst, but that's just me not knowing basic electricity. The thing that makes this fun for me is that I'm stuck and I get off watching you watch me...you're looking at my every reaction and watching me test restraints, and then you're making adjustments. You really do a great job with this gear. Also, the TENS unit is my favorite electro, and it was fun to play with that with you. I noticed that you were well aware of the hot spot issues and used the gel liberally -- it was excellent; I've played with guys that didn't understand that and it didn't feel good at all.
Flogging:
I am not much for flogging, but I got off getting flogged by you. I was wondering if you'd hit in the dangerous kidney zone (a common mistake for people that don't know better), and of course you didn't -- you know your flogging too well to make that mistake. You read me like a book and matched my ability to take a hit. I got off on your obvious interest in flogging and types of floggers -- it made it hot to know that you were enjoying yourself too. I liked how you made me count down a set of strikes toward the end.
JackOff Machine:
Fuck that was fun. Hadn't gotten to play with one of those before. I had in mind only cumming once, but you clearly had in mind to get a second load out of me, and you did. Your patience really paid off. I could tell you were going to work with that unit until you got it to work right. Seemed like the sucker column needed to be attached somewhere; afterward I wondered if it would help if that were strapped/taped/belted to my abs to keep it in place while it pumped away...was thinking that would steady it, and make it go on for a long time. Also, I wonder if a guy needs to be shaved down there (or trimmed better than I was) to help maintain suction; maybe the pubes fucked it up and/or I needed a different size tube for the size of my cock. Regardless, that was an incredibly fun way to cum.
Afterwards:
Showering up and visiting for a bit afterwards was another classy touch. I think a bit of 'come back down' time is important after a great scene to get back in 'normal world' head space, and that worked well.
A few final thoughts:
You are really skilled at watching reactions and reacting to the bottom's experience by adjusting intensity, duration, etc. No marks that lasted longer than a couple hours. You're great about not leaving marks in places they can be seen. I remember the room being cold; you were probably hot because you were doing all the work and were in leather; that said, the cold chains and being naked quickly drops the temperature
The way you say exactly what is on your mind is refreshing; the way you express yourself is no-fluff and I like that
Would be fun to be gagged with a really good gag that would completely make it impossible to make any noise other than a muffled, "mmmmmmmphffff!!!!!" Taking away a guys ability to speak is really hot in my book
check out the Nose Hook and Chain at Mr. S...I bought one of these and it is off the charts effective...your bondage imagination could do wonders with this I think: Nose Hook & Chain
I think it would be hot for you to set a rule and enforce it...a give and take...I cum and I have to give something up...a choice of two evils to pick from..."okay, so you shoot your load and then you have to make a decision...either get your pubes clappered off or I write my name on your chest and back with a permanent marker...you have 10 seconds to decide; no decision I do them both."
Would be hot to see your cock out, seeing you rub one out while I strained and pulled helplessly against wave after wave of TENS unit electro stim
Thinking back over playing with you the other day, I wanted to send you the feedback I promised.
Arriving:
Seeing you open your door decked out in full gear gives me a boner thinking about it even as I type this. You go all out, and the sight of pecs and muscles straining through all that leather and harness...it sets the stage very nicely. You also are great about building trust and comfort by offering a drink and chilling out for a bit in the kitchen to make a guy feel at ease. You did that on both of my visits and it's a classy touch.
Walking Upstairs:
A guy I played with several years ago had a thing where after arrival and a brief chat, he'd say, "okay, so are you ready for this?", and then upon the affirmative, he'd lock on a chain collar with a solid padlock, and say, "okay, this stays on for the duration; I want you to remember that you're stuck until I let you go, and this collar I just put you in will make sure you remember," and he'd lead me to the playroom like a dog on a leash; usually in cuffs and gagged; once blindfolded. I can imagine you doing something like that to demonstrate you're in charge from that minute onwards. I also liked the way you said, "okay, strip." Simple, commanding, no-nonsense.
Workout Bondage Bench:
That piece of gear is just fantastic, and you have really thought out how to use it to it's full potential. I love when you put me on that, and meticulously adjust each restraint and chain and spreader bar until there is almost zero movement possible. I also like the intense look in your eyes as you engineer the locking, and I get off big time watching your muscles as you chain me up. Consider getting a set of these Humane Restraints with adjustable locking slots. Your black leather restraints clearly do the job, but they are light and if the world were really ending I think I could break them if I had to to get away. The Humane Restraints (the ones pictured are the best of the series because they are adjustable with the slots and good for connecting to things) would take the experience to the next level in terms of helplessness and also would make chaining a guy up even easier for you, as you connect the chain/lock to the restraint, and doing so completes the locking mechanism. Here's a link, and you can buy these many places, including eBay:
Humane Restraint Leather 501 Restraint, Wrist, Standard, 15", Pair
Electro: (wand/chain):
I didn't know I was into this gear, but obviously I am, even thought I don't really like the electro zap (but anything mixed with good bondage works for me I'd say). It has an 18th century feel to it, so it's intriguing. It makes me a little nervous because it seems more like raw electricity straight out of the wall, but you have a command of it and are very careful. I worried a bit when I thought about the electro unit and the metal of the bondage bench and chains...wondered if somehow the electro could arc and come from the unit to the wall in a big burst, but that's just me not knowing basic electricity. The thing that makes this fun for me is that I'm stuck and I get off watching you watch me...you're looking at my every reaction and watching me test restraints, and then you're making adjustments. You really do a great job with this gear. Also, the TENS unit is my favorite electro, and it was fun to play with that with you. I noticed that you were well aware of the hot spot issues and used the gel liberally -- it was excellent; I've played with guys that didn't understand that and it didn't feel good at all.
Flogging:
I am not much for flogging, but I got off getting flogged by you. I was wondering if you'd hit in the dangerous kidney zone (a common mistake for people that don't know better), and of course you didn't -- you know your flogging too well to make that mistake. You read me like a book and matched my ability to take a hit. I got off on your obvious interest in flogging and types of floggers -- it made it hot to know that you were enjoying yourself too. I liked how you made me count down a set of strikes toward the end.
JackOff Machine:
Fuck that was fun. Hadn't gotten to play with one of those before. I had in mind only cumming once, but you clearly had in mind to get a second load out of me, and you did. Your patience really paid off. I could tell you were going to work with that unit until you got it to work right. Seemed like the sucker column needed to be attached somewhere; afterward I wondered if it would help if that were strapped/taped/belted to my abs to keep it in place while it pumped away...was thinking that would steady it, and make it go on for a long time. Also, I wonder if a guy needs to be shaved down there (or trimmed better than I was) to help maintain suction; maybe the pubes fucked it up and/or I needed a different size tube for the size of my cock. Regardless, that was an incredibly fun way to cum.
Afterwards:
Showering up and visiting for a bit afterwards was another classy touch. I think a bit of 'come back down' time is important after a great scene to get back in 'normal world' head space, and that worked well.
A few final thoughts:
You are really skilled at watching reactions and reacting to the bottom's experience by adjusting intensity, duration, etc. No marks that lasted longer than a couple hours. You're great about not leaving marks in places they can be seen. I remember the room being cold; you were probably hot because you were doing all the work and were in leather; that said, the cold chains and being naked quickly drops the temperature
The way you say exactly what is on your mind is refreshing; the way you express yourself is no-fluff and I like that
Would be fun to be gagged with a really good gag that would completely make it impossible to make any noise other than a muffled, "mmmmmmmphffff!!!!!" Taking away a guys ability to speak is really hot in my book
check out the Nose Hook and Chain at Mr. S...I bought one of these and it is off the charts effective...your bondage imagination could do wonders with this I think: Nose Hook & Chain
I think it would be hot for you to set a rule and enforce it...a give and take...I cum and I have to give something up...a choice of two evils to pick from..."okay, so you shoot your load and then you have to make a decision...either get your pubes clappered off or I write my name on your chest and back with a permanent marker...you have 10 seconds to decide; no decision I do them both."
Would be hot to see your cock out, seeing you rub one out while I strained and pulled helplessly against wave after wave of TENS unit electro stim
From happyfrosh
Thank you. This is really useful to me, an aspiring newbie.
There are some things that go through my mind about some of these things. The first thing that I need to say is that you are right.
The asking the person to strip and put on the handcuffs is about creating an unambiguous surrender of control, as opposed to taking control. It also proves consensuality, which is really important to me. If they flinch at that i want to know so that I can immediately start to ratchet down the play.
In the middle of ordering the humane restraints. Wow they make you jump through hoops.
The violet wand is considered to be safe anywhere on the body except the eyeballs. Hitting the chain, which I did a couple times simply grounds it out without providing a shock to the boy on the bench. There is a theoretical short of the Tesla coil for the one that sends electricity through my body, which is dealt with by a spark gap, essentially a very good fuse, where the chain attachment connects to the generator. When I accidentally touched the chain a couple times with my hand or my thigh it gave me a small shock since it was only touching a small amount of my flesh, but you didn't notice since the restraint chains effectively spread the shock over so large an area of your body that it is impossible to feel.
I know never thud the kidneys. Never thud. Never thud. I did intentionally give a couple light swats with the lightest flogger to those areas. But never thud. I do get off on flogging. The countdown was a way of letting you know that there was an end in sight so that I could go a little harder for a couple strokes without you panicking. :)
I'm not sure about the jackoff machine. It seems so impersonal and I felt
so absent. Possibly a good thing to occupy if there's more than one bottom. But I felt much more connected simply jacking you off. I think I can make it work better with experience and liberal amounts of lube. But experimenting on myself without a break provided by my fiddling, getting jacked just after cumming can be something akin to torture.
The having of a drink is for me both a way of showing that I'm not the monster that I was upstairs, and an opportunity to probe for feedback on how well or poorly I had done. I recently added the suggestion of showering as a way of letting the bottom have a couple minutes to themselves to process. It worries me that they may not be in a position to be alone at that moment though.
For me almost the entire experience is visual, so the reactions are what I'm really watching for. That's why I'm there and I don't want to miss a moment of it.
I keep the house at 72 degrees Fahrenheit, which is what's comfortable for me running around the house naked. But I had failed to understand that you were limited in movement, so would feel colder.
I have the gags, and keep wanting to use them. But I'm terrified of missing a safe word. There has to be some middle ground.
I really have never mixed sex with bondage, even to masturbate to orgasm with a boy chained up. It's not that I don't get off on it; I do. And the bondage is important to me. I start to get squirrely after about a week without play, and friends start to notice that there's something different. I have pulled my cock out and rubbed it against the boy. I hadn't realized how important that could be to you.
I'm slowly learning.
Thank you. Playing with you has been my two favorite experiences.
There are some things that go through my mind about some of these things. The first thing that I need to say is that you are right.
The asking the person to strip and put on the handcuffs is about creating an unambiguous surrender of control, as opposed to taking control. It also proves consensuality, which is really important to me. If they flinch at that i want to know so that I can immediately start to ratchet down the play.
In the middle of ordering the humane restraints. Wow they make you jump through hoops.
The violet wand is considered to be safe anywhere on the body except the eyeballs. Hitting the chain, which I did a couple times simply grounds it out without providing a shock to the boy on the bench. There is a theoretical short of the Tesla coil for the one that sends electricity through my body, which is dealt with by a spark gap, essentially a very good fuse, where the chain attachment connects to the generator. When I accidentally touched the chain a couple times with my hand or my thigh it gave me a small shock since it was only touching a small amount of my flesh, but you didn't notice since the restraint chains effectively spread the shock over so large an area of your body that it is impossible to feel.
I know never thud the kidneys. Never thud. Never thud. I did intentionally give a couple light swats with the lightest flogger to those areas. But never thud. I do get off on flogging. The countdown was a way of letting you know that there was an end in sight so that I could go a little harder for a couple strokes without you panicking. :)
I'm not sure about the jackoff machine. It seems so impersonal and I felt
so absent. Possibly a good thing to occupy if there's more than one bottom. But I felt much more connected simply jacking you off. I think I can make it work better with experience and liberal amounts of lube. But experimenting on myself without a break provided by my fiddling, getting jacked just after cumming can be something akin to torture.
The having of a drink is for me both a way of showing that I'm not the monster that I was upstairs, and an opportunity to probe for feedback on how well or poorly I had done. I recently added the suggestion of showering as a way of letting the bottom have a couple minutes to themselves to process. It worries me that they may not be in a position to be alone at that moment though.
For me almost the entire experience is visual, so the reactions are what I'm really watching for. That's why I'm there and I don't want to miss a moment of it.
I keep the house at 72 degrees Fahrenheit, which is what's comfortable for me running around the house naked. But I had failed to understand that you were limited in movement, so would feel colder.
I have the gags, and keep wanting to use them. But I'm terrified of missing a safe word. There has to be some middle ground.
I really have never mixed sex with bondage, even to masturbate to orgasm with a boy chained up. It's not that I don't get off on it; I do. And the bondage is important to me. I start to get squirrely after about a week without play, and friends start to notice that there's something different. I have pulled my cock out and rubbed it against the boy. I hadn't realized how important that could be to you.
I'm slowly learning.
Thank you. Playing with you has been my two favorite experiences.
I've come a long way since this.
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| A Humane Restraint that I ordered in response to this email exchange |
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| A Humane Restraint above the leather restraint that it replaced |
